MAP’s Own Election Monitor Deems Democracy Safe and PP Bocadillos Superior

Uncategorized — By admin on March 11, 2008 12:00 am

The
pink envelopes won’t fit in the ballot box anymore. There’s still plenty of room
in the box for the white envelopes, but due to the sheer size of the pink
ballot and the difficulty of fitting all this dead tree in a small envelope,
the box is already more than full. The chairman of the table manages to force it
in with a ruler, but it’s clear that a new box is needed. And where to put the
full one? Five people simultaneously start reading the manual.

It’s
election day and last month three citizens living in the centre of Madrid were randomly
chosen to become the chairman and assistants of one of 10 ballot boxes in the
Insituto San Isidro in Calle Toledo. They receive between 80 and 100 euros for
their effort and can ask for a few hours off from their jobs the next day to make
up for the lost Sunday.

They
have a manual in front of them explaining how to receive the 578 neighbors that
are entitled to vote at their desk. Any
decision the three officials make must be made based on a majority between them.
The biggest parties, PP and PSOE, are represented by an ‘inventor’: a person
who sits at the same table, keeps a record of who’s voted, and anything that
might infringe on The Rules. Later on,
he or she will also help count the ballots. That’s 5 people per table and right
now they’re all trying to figure out what to do with the full box.

It’s
decided that the opening has to be sealed, just as the manual says, and that
the box can be put under the table. One assistant goes looking for an empty box
and the PSOE inventor puts standard adhesive tape on the opening. Two minutes
later the voting can be resumed.

An older woman walks up. She recognizes one of
the assistants and asks if his mother is okay. Her name is read aloud from her ID-card
and the other assistant and the PSOE inventor look for her name on the list.
She is number 500 and something on the list, a number which is repeated twice
so that all 5 have the chance to jot it down; she will be registered as the 267^th
voter of that day. That last number is written after her name on the list, so
she cannot accidentally vote twice. Fool proof.

The
chairman puts the white envelope – for the deputies – in the box for her and
declares ‘ Vota!’. The pink envelope for
the senate receives the same treatment. A ‘ Vota!’ follows as well. The PSOE inventor congratulates the woman for
having cast her vote. In a country where elections are not held, but ‘celebrated’,
congratulating someone on having voted seems appropriate. The PP inventor doesn’t
look up from his newspaper. The assistant promises to send her regards to his
mother and then the table is ready for vote number 268.

A
few minutes later, this table starts chatting with the table in front of them -
same district but they do the first half of the alphabet. And what have they
done exactly with their full pink ballot box? Oh, with official tape? And where
did they get that? Right, in the same
envelope as the manual. The adhesive tape on the full box is swiftly replaced
and the five agree that the incident is not serious enough to be officially
reported.

This
may seem trifling, but no incident, in or leading up to the elections, is considered
irrelevant in the world of Spanish voting. Already noted as an infraction was the fact
that several weeks ago the local postman had not bothered ringing the doorbell and
having the gentleman sign when he received his official notification of
“Charimanship” – rules are rules . A small discussion begins between the chairman
and his assistants about where to put the official results later that day. The
PP inventor is now completely absorbed in his newspaper, but the PSOE inventor
remembers how it was done last time and digs up the form. He makes the
assistants promise to take good care and not accidentally write down the PP
results one line too low which belongs to the former Franco party. They
promise.

Then
it’s lunchtime and plastic bags arrive. The PSOE inventor jumps up and is the
first to take his bocadillo, apple and soda. PSOE and PP supply their
volunteers, while the chairman and his assistants can have a short break and
leave their posts one by one to find themselves something to eat. These bags are
from the socialists. The bocadillos de jamon are gone in minutes, but the ones
with cheese last longer: not that good. The PSOE inventor mumbles that the PP
bocadillos are usually a lot better than his – they have chorizo pate – and
that is the only good thing about their entire party.
The PP inventor manages to look up and launches an uncomfortable grin. He then
returns to his paper. There are still 5 hours of voting left.